{"id":55941,"date":"2011-12-21T08:43:56","date_gmt":"2011-12-21T07:43:56","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/laindependent.cat\/la-dependencia-emocional-una-preso-invisible\/"},"modified":"2011-12-21T08:43:56","modified_gmt":"2011-12-21T07:43:56","slug":"la-dependencia-emocional-una-preso-invisible","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/laindependent.cat\/en\/la-dependencia-emocional-una-preso-invisible\/","title":{"rendered":"La depend\u00e8ncia emocional: Una pres\u00f3 invisible"},"content":{"rendered":"

El divendres al mat\u00ed vaig estar en un institut de secund\u00e0ria explicant el terrible tema de la viol\u00e8ncia de g\u00e8nere a un grup de noies i nois de primer i segon de batxillerat. Vaig preparar una intervenci\u00f3 participativa perqu\u00e8 fossin elles i ells qui a trav\u00e9s de les seves pr\u00f2pies paraules poguessin anar desmuntant els mites que segueixen justificant aquest fenomen tan monstru\u00f3s.<\/span><\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/p>\n

Vaig preparar deu estereotips perqu\u00e8 els fossin desmuntant. Crec que el que m\u00e9s els va costar d\u2019entendre va ser el que diu que “si una dona \u00e9s maltractada cont\u00ednuament, la culpa \u00e9s seva per continuar convivint amb el seu maltractador”. I crec que els va costar d\u2019entendre perqu\u00e8 no tenien en compte un factor tan decisiu en aquest tema com ho \u00e9s la depend\u00e8ncia emocional.<\/span><\/p>\n

Els parlem del cicle de la viol\u00e8ncia i de les seves tres fases i de la depend\u00e8ncia emocional, aquesta potent eina que si no es controla adequadament i es va frenant poc a poc a partir del seu reconeixement, pot causar grans estralls.<\/span><\/p>\n

L\u2019agressor pot comen\u00e7ar a a\u00efllar la dona del seu entorn, de la seva fam\u00edlia i, a m\u00e9s a naturalitzar aquest tipus d\u2019amor possessiu i exclusiu que, si no es reconeix a temps per part de la v\u00edctima com a conseq\u00fc\u00e8ncia de l\u2019enamorament o d\u2019altres factors externs, pot causar un perjudici extremadament dolor\u00f3s.<\/span><\/p>\n

Aix\u00f2 va a redundar en una autoestima cada vegada m\u00e9s baixa i sustentada b\u00e0sicament en la necessitat d\u2019afecte per part de l\u2019agressor que, al seu torn necessitar\u00e0 controlar cada vegada m\u00e9s, fent creure que sense ell, la vida d’ella no t\u00e9 sentit.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00c9s molt complicat sortir d\u2019aquesta situaci\u00f3 i fer el pas de separar o de denunciar al teu agressor quan a m\u00e9s t\u2019han fet creure que sense ell tens poques possibilitats de ser o d\u2019existir com a persona.<\/span><\/p>\n

La llibertat de la v\u00edctima deixa d\u2019existir i \u00e9s freq\u00fcent que es culpin de les reaccions hostils que reben, donant lloc a inversions constants de la responsabilitat respecte del malestar. Aix\u00ed mateix, demanen all\u00f2 no els \u00e9s donat espont\u00e0niament i que se suposa que han d\u2019estar en les bases d\u2019un vincle estable (atenci\u00f3, afecte, cura), els dependents solen lliurar aquests components de manera maximitzada, per aix\u00f2 tamb\u00e9 aquests vincles no tenen simetria.<\/span><\/p>\n

M\u2019he perm\u00e8s recordar aquests factors per poder exigir socialment que no se segueixi victimitzant a les v\u00edctimes d\u2019aquest tipus de terrorisme, culpant-les de mantenir-se al costat dels seus agressors i de seguir rebent agressions, perqu\u00e8 la depend\u00e8ncia emocional \u00e9s una cosa de la que ning\u00fa, cap persona, estem exempts quan hi ha lla\u00e7os afectius o s\u2019est\u00e0 en la fase de l\u2019enamorament.<\/span><\/p>\n

Estic molt farta de comentaris d\u2019alguns professionals del sector sociosanitari en aquest mateix sentit.<\/span><\/p>\n

A les v\u00edctimes se les ha d\u2019ajudar, escoltar i no q\u00fcestionar les seves paraules. A les v\u00edctimes se\u2019ls ha d\u2019oferir amb delicadesa tot el suport institucional. Se\u2019ls ha d\u2019ajudar a recon\u00e8ixer la seva situaci\u00f3 i refor\u00e7ar-les perqu\u00e8 s\u2019allunyin d\u2019aquesta realitat perniciosa en qu\u00e8 viuen. A les v\u00edctimes se les ha de saber entendre entre l\u00ednies per saber que de vegades diuen bastant m\u00e9s del que estem escoltant. Cal recon\u00e8ixer quan demanen ajuda, de vegades des del propi silenci.<\/span><\/p>\n

Crec que ja est\u00e0 b\u00e9 de culpabilitzar-les de la seva pr\u00f2pia situaci\u00f3 de la qual s\u00f3n nom\u00e9s v\u00edctimes i no culpables. Hi ha de donar la volta als missatges neomatxistes que busquen amb aquests estereotips culpabilitats entre les actuacions dels qui les pateixen.<\/span><\/p>\n

Cal desmuntar aquestes trampes f\u00e0cils en qu\u00e8 en nom d\u2019una llibertat inexistent en aquestes situacions, se\u2019ls exigeix ??que actu\u00efn com si realment ho fossin.<\/span><\/p>\n

Les presons no s\u00f3n nom\u00e9s les dels barrots. Hi ha un altre tipus de presons que s\u00f3n invisibles, per\u00f2 que existeixen i s\u00f3n molt m\u00e9s repressives que les que es gestionen institucionalment. I si l\u2019estat de dret busca la integraci\u00f3 de les persones privades de llibertat temporalment pels seus errors, per qu\u00e8 no actuem de la mateixa manera amb les dones que ja s\u00f3n v\u00edctimes d\u2019una situaci\u00f3 de privaci\u00f3 de llibertat dins de la seva pr\u00f2pia situaci\u00f3 de parella ?, per qu\u00e8 seguim negant-los la condici\u00f3 de v\u00edctima d\u2019una dif\u00edcil situaci\u00f3 i els prestem tota l\u2019ajuda que necessiten?<\/span><\/p>\n

Les trampes del patriarcat, la seva immensa capacitat de transformar i adaptar-se als nou temps per subsistir tenen molt a veure en aix\u00f2.<\/span><\/p>\n

Per\u00f2 les trampes es poden desmuntar i en aix\u00f2 som moltes les persones compromeses. Potser tantes o m\u00e9s de les que es puguin imaginar. I per tant seguirem denunciant aquestes situacions i intentant desmuntar-les.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

El divendres al mat\u00ed vaig estar en un institut de secund\u00e0ria explicant el terrible tema de la viol\u00e8ncia de g\u00e8nere a un grup de noies i nois de primer i segon de batxillerat. Vaig preparar una intervenci\u00f3 participativa perqu\u00e8 fossin […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":72,"featured_media":55938,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26666],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-55941","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-opinio-violencies"],"yoast_head":"\nLa depend\u00e8ncia emocional: Una pres\u00f3 invisible | La Independent<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"El divendres al mat\u00ed vaig estar en un institut de secund\u00e0ria explicant el terrible tema de la viol\u00e8ncia de g\u00e8nere a un grup de noies i nois de primer i\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/laindependent.cat\/en\/la-dependencia-emocional-una-preso-invisible\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" 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